If i said i wasn't upset.. i will be kidding u.

If i said i wasn't angry.. i will be kidding u.

I juz dun wanna think anymore..

Fine..

I will make sure things be like what u wan it to be.. sick n tired..

Dun test me..

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Hate it when u do something sweet for me.. coz i know it won't last long..

When u show ur care n concern.. it makes me feel so bad that i have been the most horrible shit to u and i feel so bad n guilty towards u.. and i would start trying to make amendments to u..

and then..

sooner or later, something would happen that will make me dislike u again..

Pops.. tell me.. what exactly happened?

i still remember sitting on ur shoulder with nana on the other side.. laughing n playing.. saying that we 3 are the most precious things in the world.. how did things become like this?

I still remember when we used to be close.. mummy and u went overseas.. i actually cried and hugged u when u guys were gonna leave for the airport.. but yet now.. i juz can't wait for u to be overseas.. even counting down the days..

i still remember being carried by you and snuggling up to u n buried my whole face in ur neck during ur fren's wedding dinner coz i was so shy to meet new pple..

Then things had to change ever since the day i fell down the stairs.. we became distant.. i didn't know u anymore..

I know u're very upset abt things being like this too.. why can't u open up to us? why can't u open ur heart to us even when i said i hate u.. even when i kept on hitting my hand.. even when i cried until there was no tmw.. even when i begged u to open to us..

i guess all of us need to play a part in what happened to us now.. will the day ever come where all of us can sit down n talk n laugh without arguing?

* * * * * * * * * * * * *

I dun need much.. I juz need beer over the weekend with my usual..

Can't wait..

May the alcohol drown my sorrows..