I have never hated myself so much before.

I have lied to alot of pple this week that it makes me so sick to the core. I have never lied so much in my life before.

What i'm doing is wrong. and i wish i never stepped into the shit in the first place.

Please don't ask me what happened coz i dun wish to lie anymore.

I feel so sick and horrible inside and i can't tell anyone abt it.

Now i know why i wanna leave Conrad so much.

It's not coz of the work or the workload.

It's because i'm tired of being involved and i'm tired of lying.

I tried to be supportive coz they're my frens..

but yet, i know deep down inside that i'm going against my principals.

I juz wanna move on with my life.

u know one feeling i can't stand??

I can't stand the feeling that you care for a person but yet, u can't show too much care n concern coz that person might get the wrong idea or pple around us might get the wrong idea.

Bloody hell... why am i so concerned in the first place for what... I think i need therapy. this is bad...

But when that person is with me or in the same place as me, i won't feel like caring or showing concern for that person.

What is this?

Am i going bonkers?

Yay!!! Cinz is coming back tmw.. i can't wait!!! i missed her like crazy... :)

This week has been a relaxing week. Have been "acting" busy from 6 plus onwards since monday.. haha.. then i would leave at 8pm sharp.. dunno whether it can be like this for the rest of the week.

Yawn.. waiting for the time to pass once again. haha

Anyway.. i watched a movie last nite.. It's called "udon".. abt some guy, a japanese island and the japanese noodles.. it was ok laaaa.. but very draggy.. my butt was aching.. haha.. and this guy who was sitting in front of us fell alseep and he was snoring damn loud! -_- then, i reached home at abt 2 plus.. and i had to get up at 6 plus..

i'm practically stoning the whole day and my brain is kinda getting soggy...

I kinda accidentally told ailing that UNLV starts in Sept.. now she wants me to extend my stay.. Shit!! OH well.... nth should happened to me, rite?

Anyway, i can't wait for my girls' stay in tmw @ Fi's hse & the outing with my other darlings on 18th.. :)

YAY!!!

After that week of hard work.. haha.. i'm having a relaxed may.. hahhaahaa.. let me tell u why..

1) I'm only handling the tax free group
2) I'm only keying in corporate n travel agent corporate rates for 2007
3) I'm off for the coming weekend.. on fri, sat n sun..

Yay!!!

heehee.. :)